Thank you to Ice-Sphinx to inspire me to this blog and to address these philosophical issues in broader public. Sapphire quickly became a dear friend and is a master where I sap to be able to express the basics. I hope she will join in this blog and share her own thoughts about philosophical issues.

A constant nuisance for me is for example the difficulty I have explaining what love and friendship mean to me when talking English. I do refer to the ancient Greek definitions quite a bit in my life, so I will try to explain my understanding of the underlying concepts on that basis as well.

• Love in the way I use the word is the mix of Eros and Agape.
• True friendship is the mix of Agape and Philia.

So using the English definition and language I can love many people, without any “indecent” thoughts. And in fact, I consider some people true friends and I do love them dearly! And I cannot (never have been able to) truly “love” on the basis of Eros, without Agape.

But in English, all the time I mention “love” in this context to someone, there is confusion. If I address someone “my dear”… But a friend can be anything from someone I have met somewhere once - to a loved friend in the meaning of Agape and Philia.

Raised with traditional values, I value friendship truly. Anyone I meet somewhere, I approach faithfully and honest. What could I gain lying? How could I expect someone to trust me, if I don’t trust that person myself? Agape says that love is mutual and the more you love, the more you will be loved. But once you lied, how should someone trust you ever again unconditionally?

I found it rather a two-edged sword. If you are trusted, you feel obliged to meet it with faith. But if you are being approached with reservations, you keep your own. How shall you become friends, if you do not trust? I found it to always fail when I have been trying to convince people who are reserved that they should open up to me. They never truly did.

Today all my true friends are “naturals”. They know they can rely on me. As I know, I can rely on them. And I can trust them as unconditionally, as they trust me. This is mutual. And honesty is the basis.

» Jürgen

Time Enought For Love is a title by Robert A Heinlein. This is a title of one of the best books I ever read, which I can reread any time, especially the first part. Another on is Illusions, by Richard Bach, author also of Jonathan Livingston Seagull.

English is a very bad language to talk about philosophical concepts, especially where the concepts of love and friendship are involved. So I would like to share some of my interpretation of these concepts and have invited a master to join me in this challenge…

Jürgen
Leipzig, Germany
September 2008