Would Marco Polo have been able to survive the first year of travel if he had been as focused on cultural differences as many people today are? Would my best friends not only be Germans?

“Build a wall around Russia” an Irish consultant told me lately (2008) on LinkedIn when I asked a question on my research about a Russian province. Those are the proud but prejudiced idiots that make our world miserable. Full of hatred for things they do not understand.

Russian friend Olga wrote me about making friends in Russia:

1. Be honest and keep your promises, have and show out respect to the country and to the people. Show you trust the Russian side as much as all other countries.
2. Behave yourself to the Russian partners, colleges etc. same as from other countries.
3. Underline what is in common in life, business etc. - not what differs.

She closes: … Usually Russians are open-hearted and friendly people

But these are universal truths. Honesty. Respect. Faith. Reliability.

Xenia, the concept about hospitality is natural in most societies. It requires as much effort from guest as from host. Did Marco Polo not make friends across the barriers of culture or language during his travels?

» Jürgen

The Ten Commandments are frequently discussed as outdated or even obsolete. Based on a discussion by Maureen Johnson with her father in To Sail Beyond The Sunset, concepts of Alan Dean Foster in his Commonwealth and many discussions with friends, I came up with the following 10 New Commandments.

If you object, please discuss with us.
If you like them, spread them!

1. There is a god. All variants in the end are facettes of that same truth.
2. Do not murder or command murder.
3. Honor and foster love and live in all it’s facettes.
4. Love your spouse, children and friends and nourish your love.
5. Raise your children that they are proud about their heritage.
6. Help when you can.
7. Treat all live with respect. Foster nature and it’s resources.
8. Do not acquire valuables without a fair compensation.
9. Do not lie without a very good cause.
10. God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
    courage to change the things I can,
    and the wisdom to know the difference.

1 Don’t believe the priests or politicians trying to convince you differently.
2 That includes mass murder as war. The sin.
3 is main to 4, 5, 6, 7… Not limited to human life, but also nature!
4 includes to spend time with the family (nourishing, “Sabbath”)
6-8 includes not to abuse labor
10 Thank you friend and co-author Ice-Sphinx for suggesting the Serenity Prayer as No. 10!

» Jürgen

a new momentum
one that could have been yearning
for a moment more

stifling look that his
mirror was smiling with the
widest of eyes brown

think I was starting
to think I was starting to
think I have spare time

down most of life churches
we’ve seen on this bulbine which
I have to grow in

towering above
the lantana planted there
against the skyline

I put away just
in case of a soft storm or
winds that visit

the dust yesterday
and I am now watching
as it is covered

xsapph

This is friendship.

Unaffected,
natural progressive harmony,
streams that mesh into one
the murmur of throaty thunder
then a piercing shard of light
slashes the horizon
diamond brilliance
it’s clarity:
simple Self-sacrifice,
requiring no prior planning,
absolution, or apology.
Spontaneous simplicity
it just simply is.

Grimy indifference would ne’er
comprehend or act.

Yet… I can also reflect on another thought that supposes …
It is a delicious quote by an exquisite talent that was lost when he was shot down in the war in the bunkers…

“The sacrifices of friendship were beautiful in her eyes as long as she was not asked to make them.”

by: [H.H. (Hector Hugh) Munro] Saki (1870-1916), Scottish author. Beasts and Super-Beasts, “Fur.” Pseudonym oh Hector Hugh Munro.

xsapph

Another concept in the context of “love” and the ancient Greek definitions is Xenia:

I always called this “Open Door Principle”. Anyone is welcome any time.

There is a simple rule I get very upset if it is ignored: You are guest. You do not own the place for being offered my hospitality. I happily share what I have, but the rules of courtesy and my household are applied. And I shared even to people I did not know in case of need. And made “friends” doing so.

The most common rules for anything applied to the ancient Greek rules:

» Jürgen

Thank you to Ice-Sphinx to inspire me to this blog and to address these philosophical issues in broader public. Sapphire quickly became a dear friend and is a master where I sap to be able to express the basics. I hope she will join in this blog and share her own thoughts about philosophical issues.

A constant nuisance for me is for example the difficulty I have explaining what love and friendship mean to me when talking English. I do refer to the ancient Greek definitions quite a bit in my life, so I will try to explain my understanding of the underlying concepts on that basis as well.

• Love in the way I use the word is the mix of Eros and Agape.
• True friendship is the mix of Agape and Philia.

So using the English definition and language I can love many people, without any “indecent” thoughts. And in fact, I consider some people true friends and I do love them dearly! And I cannot (never have been able to) truly “love” on the basis of Eros, without Agape.

But in English, all the time I mention “love” in this context to someone, there is confusion. If I address someone “my dear”… But a friend can be anything from someone I have met somewhere once - to a loved friend in the meaning of Agape and Philia.

Raised with traditional values, I value friendship truly. Anyone I meet somewhere, I approach faithfully and honest. What could I gain lying? How could I expect someone to trust me, if I don’t trust that person myself? Agape says that love is mutual and the more you love, the more you will be loved. But once you lied, how should someone trust you ever again unconditionally?

I found it rather a two-edged sword. If you are trusted, you feel obliged to meet it with faith. But if you are being approached with reservations, you keep your own. How shall you become friends, if you do not trust? I found it to always fail when I have been trying to convince people who are reserved that they should open up to me. They never truly did.

Today all my true friends are “naturals”. They know they can rely on me. As I know, I can rely on them. And I can trust them as unconditionally, as they trust me. This is mutual. And honesty is the basis.

» Jürgen

Time Enought For Love is a title by Robert A Heinlein. This is a title of one of the best books I ever read, which I can reread any time, especially the first part. Another on is Illusions, by Richard Bach, author also of Jonathan Livingston Seagull.

English is a very bad language to talk about philosophical concepts, especially where the concepts of love and friendship are involved. So I would like to share some of my interpretation of these concepts and have invited a master to join me in this challenge…

Jürgen
Leipzig, Germany
September 2008